Spam, spam, spam, spam...

I like that my gmail gives me suggested links based on the content of my email (I try not to think about what that means in terms of confidentiality). I must really enjoy it because it's the second post I've written on the subject. My current favorite feature is that my junk mail folder helpfully suggests recipes for the spam I have received, the most recent of which is "Spam Swiss Pie". I think my gmail is fundamentally an optimist of the "if life gives you lemons, make lemonade" variety.

It runs into a bit of a clash in definitions though; it's using SPAM (canned, precooked luncheon meat product made by the Hormel Foods Corporation (key ingredients: chopped pork shoulder meat and sodium nitrite to help "keep its color") as spam (the abuse of email systems to send unsolicited bulk messages).

If you put that into practice, you end up with some very odd recipes, for example:

- Penis Enhancement Pie
- Replica Rolex Ratatouille
- Casino Winner Casserole
- Viagra Vichyssoise
- Phish(ing) Fricassee
- Hot Naked Single Teenage Meatloaf

Isn't it funny how spam solicits you to enjoy things which are otherwise difficult to obtain: sex, drugs, money and time, but only in their basest forms. If only purchasing a Rolex bought me more hours in a day! The sleep would do me some good. Yay sleep! That's where I'm a viking! (Spam, spam, spam, spam. Spam, spam, spam, spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!)



(With apologies to both Monty Python and the Simpsons).